Girl meets guy who seems to fit the description of her idea of "Mr. Right". He's nice, funny, attractive, very much stable and most of all, she thinks he likes her. She just had a bad break up with this other guy who had a gf and she was not chosen in the end. Yes, this new guy also has a gf but then he chooses to be with her at the moment. So what? He is a potential realtionship which can alter the pain she has just been thru. This can perfectly make her point to the other guy who just left her that she will be better than him. She will never do her revenge, nevertheless if this new guy clicks, then she can perfectly prove herself to the other guy. Besides, she's already in her late 20s. It will be hard for her to find a decent man the more she gets older. So this is it, she will make the most of the given situation. She will win this potential new guy. She then starts working on building a relationship with this new guy. She tries to make all things right for him to completely fall for her. She's sweet and nice, she cooks perfectly, she handles intellectual converstion quite well, she does the same activities he does, she ventured herself to several ways to make her more attractive and deserving, she gives everything she thinks of that will make her qualify to win his heart. Not to mention, she included God as well for this a perfect recipe to fully win the guy. She begins to dream about their wedding since she might be the one, learning from this guy that he was about to get married but he had his doubts. She imagines a potential life with him. She bears in mind, that no matter what, she will beat his current siginificant other. While she has jumped ahead to the exclusivity stage, the new guy is still working through his uncertainty. Yes he is amazed by her perfection, so he also shows he cares. And this motivates her more and more. Suddenly, the truth came out, she is not the one. Out of the blue, everything comes to a screeching halt when he suddenly turns away.Now, she is mourning. She blames it to the guys. This is their fault. She had loved them but they used her. But the truth is, she did this to herself. She is now mourning not for the loss of her love, but the loss of the potential relationship. She does not miss the person, but the potential relationship they could have. She is in love with the fact that he can make her not single anymore. She has mistaken love with need of someone who can be with her. Yes, she never learned from her past experience. For she does not truly know where love should start or from where an honest relationship should begin with. Her search will be never ending not until she finds out the true sense of love. If she only tried to be in situations which are right from the very start. If she only considered the other people around her. If she only waited patiently for the right person to arrive....then she could never have experienced hurt and she could have found herself the love of her life by now.
*** A big part of this problem is that usually, women skip the uncertainty stage of dating. They meet a guy, like him, and decide that they want to be in a relationship with him no matter what, without going through the process of asking themselves well enough the certain questions they need to ask. They wont even consider who will be hurt nor who is hurting at that certain point of time. All they know is they wanted a partner, and so they will get it.Love is not being won, it has no recipes, no ingredients, no ways, no games. When one deserves it, then she will get it, all in God's perfect time. ***
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